Stay at Home

I've been off on interviews lately.  Full-time, real job interviews.  They are both perfect positions for me, thus I felt I had to apply.  I feel lucky to even have interviews at either of these places, especially given Rhode Island's economy. 

But I feel so conflicted.  I've spent the last 20 months at home with Miles.  Cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, being frustrated and isolated and yet the most happy I've ever been.  There is a good chance that I won't get either of these jobs, which would be disappointing for our budget, but would allow me another few months or year of being this baby's full-time mom.  I KNOW I will miss these days in a few years.  They are pretty rough sometimes, but pretty magical too.